Seriously? You're writing about this stuff?

Grumpy Cat

Usually when people say, "Seriously?" they're being a little sarcastic.

As in, "I can't believe s/he really said that."

Or, the person is surprised, shocked, taken aback, etc. and thinking, "OMG, I never KNEW that!"

Whether you are feeling sarcastic or stunned, welcome to "Seriously?"

I say that about a lot of things, lately.

Most recently, I say "Seriously?" about senior pictures.  I have a senior in high school this year.

School pictures totally suck, but senior pictures have those beat ten times over.

pinterest

If you're having these taken professionally, be prepared to pay through the nose. It's totally an investment, getting your child's senior photos done.

Prices in my area range from (the least expensive, smallest photo package) about $500 to (the most expensive) $1800.

Now, I realize that prices have gone up since I was in school back in the dinosaur age. However, senior photos shouldn't cost as much as my first used car and I shouldn't have to take out a personal loan in order to have my child's face memorialized on photo paper. Or canvas. Or tin. Or whatever other trendy thing is in for pictures to be printed upon.

I had considered staging a small-scale rebellion and encouraging everyone, via social media, to take their seniors to a studio such as Sears or JC Penney or WalMart for senior photos, but didn't think it would gain much ground.  I kind of wish it could happen though, but there are just too many parents who are willing to indulge their princesses (and princes - the photo packages/options for the boys are just as nauseating as the girls) and are willing to pay those prices.

Some people are handy with digital cameras and take beautiful photos. They don't require the services of a professional photographer. I am not one of those lucky people. If digital cameras had actual film, I would be the one exposing it.  Or taking the photo with my finger over the lens.

Adhttp://picturebrand.blogspot.com/2011/09/95-of
-worst-senior-portraits-of-all.htmld caption

I am aghast at the cost of senior photos.  They're beautiful pictures, quality work. But I don't really think my child needs a photo shoot like she's a runway model or something. What the hell, anyway?  Apparently, it is now a terrible thing to just have one pose for senior portraits, and one outfit and one hairstyle for said photo. One must now have a multitude of clothing changes, different scenes - live and local as well as studio locations, and include such props as golf clubs, french horns, horses, wiener dogs, and kayaks.

We are lucky enough to know someone who is willing to do us a huge favor by applying their professional skills to this task of senior photos. I'll be forever indebted to this kind person for easing the pain of the costly photo shoot.

Now - I'm trying to convince my daughter to wrangle the family cat for her portraits. Or maybe the lawn mower, or that pile of dirty laundry . . .

Seriously.

School pictures suck

If today were Friday, I'd call this post The Friday Fumbles.

As it stands, it's only Thursday - and Thursday morning, at that.

My mind is empty of any rational thought.

Instead, there are a jillion things roaming around my brain, colliding and trying to make some sort of sense.  I'm sure all of us have days like that, and it's not just me.

All I can think of right now are school pictures.  That's a bad thing.

School pictures have got to be one of the worst forms of torture known to mankind.  Our school photos have been sent home within the last day or two, and I must say, they are truly horrific.  Being employed at a school, I am required to have a photo identification card.



chicagodancesingles.com

I dutifully wait in line for my turn at the camera.  Gone are the days when you'd sit on the stool with your head turned one way, torso another, and from the waist down pointing yet another direction.  Now, there are paper feet to stand on - remniscent of those old "Learn to dance" cut-out feet.

And, the head&shoulders pose is now passe. Along with the new, cut-out feet, we are subjected to the 3/4 body shot. From about waist up, hands folded demurely, this pose shows every bulge and clothing wrinkle you possess.



Grandpa Simpson

No one can possibly be more adept at making your 4th grader look stoned, the most attractive person look like they got hit by a Mack truck, the least attractive person look even more unattractive, find the wimpiest poses, the most age-inappropriate poses - capturing into infinity the way we weren't back in "dickety-two" (as Grandpa Simpson would say).

Here are some yearbook photo gems to help us tip our hats to the School Photographer.

 Let no child be left behind from the pain of school photos.

bodybuilding.com
Looks like something from
the set of "Saved by the Bell."

huffingtonpost.com
Mug shot, mayhap? Well, at
least he looks happy.

ebaumsworld.com
Mirror, Mirror, in my hand
This is the weirdest pose in the land.

current.com
No, wait. THIS is the weirdest
pose in the land.

huffingtonpost.com
Reminds me of "Meathead" from All in the Family.

tvguide.com
Meathead, All in the Family

badyearbookphotos.com
Don't mess with her - not only can she bake that
cherry pie, Billy Boy, she can whup your ass, too.



buzzfeed.com
Yep. Another photo of some innocent
girl looking stoned out of her mind.

huffingtonpst.com
What the hell?

awfulyearbook.com
The web site title says it all.

huffingtonpost.com
I loved the 1980s, and would have (possibly) killed
to have hair that looked like this every day.

huffingtonpost.com
Huffington Post dubbed this photo "Eat my Shorts." Seems
appropriate.  I feel kind of bad for the guy, though, being immortalized
this way because nobody insisted he go to picture re-take day.
Oh. Maybe this IS the retake.

 

badyearbookphotos.com
He doesn't just *look* stoned, he probably is.

badyearbookphotos.com
I like a guy who knows how to dress up.
I'm betting it was the photographer who
was stoned during this take, though.